Longing

As soon as I hit the “Publish” button yesterday, I knew I should have said something with my post. As I put this photo together, various ideas were floating in my mind concerning both the concept and process behind the final product.

Concept

I had these two photographs which were taken during my last camping trip to Anastasia State Park – one of an older, confident lady, the second of a young, watchful girl. It wasn’t until I was reviewing my pictures later that I noticed the similarities. It seemed to me that one was a reflection of the other, it’s counterpart. But which was it – was the young girl dreaming of what is to come, or the older lady reminiscing of what used to be? I posted my picture (see here) and left the question open to the observer. Yet my photo and question (Do you remember when?) implied looking back.

As I think this through, I find myself somewhere in between.

I look back to who I was, the experiences which have made me who I am. Have I forgotten and abandoned my dreams along the way? There is a desire in me for simpler times, a longing which I can’t name. As I reminisce about the past, I see the possibilities still ahead. I am where I want to be, yet know that this is not where I want to stay. I dream of a better me: spiritually, physically, emotionally. There’s still growing and learning to do.

Process

iPad app Pic Grunger, to give the photo a vague and dreamy feel
(Effect: Streaked * Texture: Pulp * Border: On)

Today the finished product looks different from what I posted yesterday. Putting my thoughts in writing made me realize that I not only look back, but also forward, to the dreams, which though transformed through the years, still remain and keep me positive and watchful for what’s to come.

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